0TSP: Episode Zero

Dusting off the Long Lost Book

Well, it finally happened.

I pushed The Book* out into the world again, after years of it gathering digital dust and machine-based mildew in the wild corners of various internal and external hard drives, plus an actual physical copy relegated to That Drawer™ in the art room, even after moving across a whole ocean with me to my new life that I swore it would be a part of.

After much delay and deliberation, I’ve decided that this year is the year I will complete that promise to Younger Rebecca. And I've decided to write about the experience. It's wholly new one to me so it will be fun to kind of journal my way through it. Plus it could be interesting or informative for any writer considering self-publishing. Plus it will help me to talk about The Book and hopefully get it closer to those who are interested in poetry and prose.

The original plan was to send the book to some high-end and middle-end publishers, or even to literary agents, and to have the kind of experience that kid-writers dream about: someone telling me that my book is worth a lot of money and that they are going to spend some of that potential on me so that they can get it out there in front of millions of eyes of adoring fans…

Eventually the rejections from “putting it out there” were feeling more like a conclusion, and into the drawer it went. This dream never really died though, and after a couple of years of therapy, I grew a bit stronger against the fear of subjecting myself to rejection once again.

I needed something to propel me forward away from giving up. I applied for a grant from the Greater Columbus Art Council (the local art council where you live might also offer grants!) to help with publishing and distribution costs, wrote to a local press to get a quote, and waited to hear back on both. I got the grant, and chose a publisher, so here we go.

I definitely feel some vulnerability around the whole process. Really This Book means the whole world to me, or more precisely, to the version of me that wrote it. (I don’t know how current me feels about it, and that’s going to be part of journey I share here too). 

But I also know that I can't have this portion of my past life(s) hanging over me any longer. I have to get it out there and out of my head, drawer, and psyche.

The Rebecca that wrote this book is not the Rebecca that is writing this blog. And who knows where we will all end up by the time it is published later this year.

Follow along for the stress and stuttering, aches and achievements, as we trundle along towards our dreams.

rlcg

* The Book I wrote in 2015/2016 after finishing my MA in Creative Writing in 2014. It is called Hauntings at the Hour of Noon, a title which my professor wasn’t crazy about but otherwise he loved it.